Hello lovelies! Have you ever struggled with loneliness? Have you ever wondered, “Is there something wrong with me? Why don’t I have any close friends?” To be honest, I think that many friendships today are shallow. It’s hard to find godly friends who will actually pour into your life. I’ve got a few of those, and they are absolute gems! But, even if you have good friends, you can still feel lonely sometimes. Today’s post is about 8 practical ways to fight loneliness.
Keep reading for 8 ways to fight loneliness.
1. Spend some time with your Saviour.
I remember reading a quote from a young Christian woman a while ago. She said, “When I felt lonely, I would tell myself, ‘This is Jesus trying to get my attention.’”
Think about it. If your heart was full with happy, satisfying friendships, if every day your emotional needs were met, would you really seek Jesus earnestly? Would you search for Him as for hid treasure?
I think not.
Jesus is jealous. He wants first place in our hearts. And, if we’ve been looking to people first to find happiness, He may let those same people disappoint us.
Each day, we should seek Jesus early. We should ask Him to fill our cups so we can go out and love others. Throughout each day, we should be looking to Him for joy, peace, and grace.
Then we can overcome loneliness and fight any battle, no matter how hard.
Now that we’ve covered the #1 way to fight loneliness, let’s dive into some practical, people-focused ideas.
2. Write a handwritten letter to a friend.
I know DMs and Snapchats are 100 million times faster, but there’s just something about a handwritten letter that says, “I love you.”
It doesn’t have to be three pages long, and you don’t have to write in cursive. Pick a cute notecard (this one is adorable) or lined paper, and get started!
Just share what’s on your heart and mind, and ask good questions about their life and interests. Let them know you’re praying for them and you appreciate their friendship.
Add a cute stamp, pop it in the mailbox, and you’re done!
Trust me- your friends will LOVE this!
3. Give your grandma (or grandpa) a phone call.
If you are blessed enough to have grandparents who are still alive, don’t neglect them! Give your grandma (or grandpa) a call and catch up on all their news. They’d love to hear from you—and they can probably give you good advice, too.
Your grandparents believe in you and are always cheering for you. If you need a listening ear or advice, call them. You won’t regret it!
4. Take a sister, mom, or friend out for coffee.
If you’re feeling lonely, take your sister, your mom, or a friend out for coffee. If you’re lucky enough to have one of those charming, totally-copying-Joanna-Gaines coffee shops in your town, go there. If not, you can always try Tim’s or Robin’s.
After you choose your favourite hot drinks (and maybe sweets too!), sit down with them. Focus on encouraging them, hearing what’s on their heart, and building them up. Tell a funny or embarrassing story about yourself, and laugh together.
As you pour into others, you’ll be amazed that your loneliness melts away. When you listen to the burdens of others, your own burdens will feel light in comparison. And your friendships will become stronger and sweeter.
If you try this once, you may find it becomes a regular habit! It’s that encouraging.
5. Join a group or class.
If you feel like you’re the only one in your family who likes crochet/cello/running/basketball/you name it, then join a group! Look through your town’s recreation flyer for a class you would enjoy, and sign up. Or search Facebook for local clubs or groups focused that hobby.
You might feel nervous the first few times, but you’ll soon start to make friends. Friendships naturally grow from shared interests. Who knows—your next best friend might be at the quilting group or photography club!
6. Get involved in a ministry at church.
Did you notice that almost every suggestion so far requires YOU to go serve OTHERS? That’s because the best cure for loneliness is serving others.
Loneliness says, “I’m alone. Nobody loves me. What am I going to do?” It tends to go hand in hand with selfishness.
To help cure your selfishness, get involved in a ministry at church. Instead of just sitting in a pew, ask your pastor (or pastor’s wife) how you can help.
Maybe you can sign up to help clean the church. Maybe you can print and fold bulletins. Or maybe you can bake cookies for the next ladies’ meeting.
When you start serving, you’ll get 2 major benefits.
- You’ll make friends with the people you are serving with.
- You’ll feel like you belong and know that you’re a necessary, valuable part of your church.
Obviously, wanting to overcome loneliness shouldn’t be our primary reason to serve. But, it’s definitely one of the benefits of serving!
7. Find someone else who’s lonely, and befriend them.
Next time you’re at church, look around. Do you see anyone who’s all alone and looking uncomfortable? Do you notice someone who needs a friend? Breathe a quick prayer for help, and go introduce yourself.
Start with small talk, and ask good questions about the other person. Is this their first time at church? What did they think of the message? If possible, invite them to another church event (or even invite them to lunch). Show that you’re interested in getting to know them better.
When you befriend someone who needs a friend, it will bless both you AND them! And it’s one of the best ways to fight loneliness.
8. Look through old photos with a family member.
God blessed humans with the capacity for memories. We can remember both happy times and tearful times. If you’re like me, you probably have albums of old family photos tucked away in a closet. (Or you might have thousands of photos stored on your computer or phone).
Take an hour or so to sit down with a family member, and go through those photos. Talk about the memories behind each one. Remind each other of funny stories and sweet memories.
You’ll be amazed at how time flies when you do this! And I think it will lift your spirits and help you overcome loneliness.
Let’s Chat:
Do you struggle with loneliness? Try calling a grandparent, looking through old photos, or finding someone else who needs encouragement. What are your favourite tips for when you feel lonely? I’d love to hear your thoughts + advice in the comment section!
These are great ideas! You are amazing my friend! 💕
Thanks so much, sweetheart! You are an amazing woman too! 💕 May God continue to bless you!
Thank you! I feel lonely sometimes too because I don’t have any friends but I really want some.♥️ And I get angry being lonely I know that’s not good because God should be our best friend even if we don’t have any. God says He will never leave us or forsake us.
Yes, God says that He will never leave us or forsake us. The way to get friends is to be a friend first. Ask God to help you find someone you can befriend, and focus on how you can give to them instead of what you can get from them. Praying for you!
I know I’m late (story of my life, seriously) but after I got the time to come back and read this, I felt like I HAD to comment.
I recently had to break off an engagement and loneliness became my constant companion. It’s ironic, really. I have 10 siblings and my parents with me literally every hour of the day. But after having had THAT kind of relationship, I felt like I needed it.
I had to come to realization that God was the only other one I truly needed in my life and affections. He has really become my best friend and my all in all. Psalm 37:4-5
I don’t know if anyone else here has struggled with this kind of loneliness, but just wanted to share the help I’ve found!
P.S.
Claudine, you are truly one of my best friends!! Love you girl!❤
Sara, you are definitely one of my besties too, and I’m so thankful for you. What a beautiful testimony! Though you had a heartbreaking situation, you sought Jesus and found that He is enough to satisfy your needs. May we all do likewise! Love you girl!! ♥️
Thank you!♥️
How can I overcome being lonely??? I get jealous when people have friends and I have none. I know that is not good.
First, follow the ideas above. Then, work on being a friend. If you have brothers and sisters, be friends with them first. You will have them your whole life, but other friends come and go. Be happy for people who have friends, not jealous. Ask God to help you and He will! ♥️
Thank you for sharing this post, Claudine!
Thank you for reading and commenting, Phebe! I’m glad it was an encouragement. God bless you! 💕
I have a question on salvation.
Why don’t you send me an email at whatdinnywore@gmail.com? I’d be happy to help if I can.
Ok… I just sent you the email
Wonderful!
Please pray for me. I thought I had gotten over my struggle with loneliness, but reading this, I realized the journey isn’t over yet.
Natalie, I would be honoured to pray for you! I know it’s hard…especially if you live in a rural area with not a lot of close friends nearby. But, with God’s help, you can overcome it! Hope these thoughts are timely. Send me an email if you’d like- whatdinnywore@gmail.com Would love to get to know you better! ♥️ Claudine
Thank you so much, Claudine! It really means a lot to me.
Another great post! I love posts like these because they are SO practical and have so many good tips! This has definitely been a struggle for me. Sometimes it’s been not feeling like I have many friends, sometimes it’s been not feeling that I have deep, meaningful friendships, and other times it’s been the struggle of not having friends nearby/not getting to see my friends. For a while now, I’ve really been investing in others, or at least trying to! Lately, I’ve been going over my prayer list before the start of the week, and thinking if there is anyone on there that I haven’t checked in with in a while or that I should send a card to, etc. And then I put it in my planner! Just a practical way to make it a priority 😉
Thanks so much for commenting, Elizabeth! I totally hear you, girl. I love your idea of looking at your prayer list. It’s so priceless to have friends that pray for you- they are such a treasure! Great idea! Love you girl!
God bless, Claudine